[ Jim isn't in the habit of lying, definitely not to the people he cares about, so Finn can definitely believe what he's telling him, whether or not it seems surreal to him. He means every word he's said so far.
Jim lets out a soft laugh when Finn kisses his cheek, once and then again, letting out a deep breath with that hug. It feels like an insurmountable weight has been lifted off of him, with something so simple as this. Something so... soft, sweet, uncomplicated.
He feels like an idiot now, he really doesn't know why he was so scared about this. ]
I'll hold you to it, [ He murmurs against Finn's shoulder, then lifts his head up just enough that Finn can hear him more clearly. ] I love you, too.
[ Finn gives another laugh, another huff of breath against Jim's skin, for hearing that again. It's so unbelievable, especially considering what he thought the world looked like not five minutes ago. A hand finds the back of James' head to hold him close, but he has no idea how to show the emotions he's got right now.
Well, one idea.
He tilts his head until his forehead is against James' temple and he reaches out. His own mental state is probably a little overwhelming right now, so he doesn't press or even attempt to invade. All he does is brush his thoughts against James' and tries to relay a little of how he feels. All of his gratefulness and fears and love - so much love - with an unbridled happiness and sense of belonging he's never felt before.
It's there for a beat and begins to wash away just as quickly as it appeared, not wanting to intrude or cause harm, but he lets out his own deep breath in the knowledge that everything's okay. That everything's perfect. ]
[ Jim feels Finn's mind reaching out to his own the instant it happens. Warm, familiar, comforting, and he lets himself relax into it without thought, sinking into those sensations without an ounce of reticence, or resistance.
If there's one thing he minds, it's that Finn pulls back almost as quickly as he reaches out, and he instantly closes that distance himself, at least to the best of his ability considering he doesn't have any unique powers nor is he Force sensitive. That he knows, anyway.
But he does open his mind, he thinks as loud as he can that he wants Finn to stay in there, to linger. Don't go, don't go, like he doesn't want Finn to hold back his feelings from him, least of all now. He wants to see and feel them all, just like he wants Finn to sense the feelings he has for him in return, how real and strong they are. ]
[ It catches his breath, that feeling of being wanted so badly, James' voice echoing back into his mind. He can feel him reaching, incapable of pulling them back together, but reaching with something close to desperation all the same. And he can feel that James doesn't want Finn to hide what he feels, overwhelming or no. James wants everything.
A quiet sob escapes him before he quickly brings them together again, nearly like a mental hug. It's so easy to get lost in it and, for once, Finn doesn't care. He quickly, easily, happily gets lost in James, bringing all of his love with him. His love, protectiveness, fears, pain, thankfulness-
Finn's far more concerned with what James feels. If it's love, he doesn't know, but it's the same thing he feels for James in return. It's strong and warm and safe and just as overwhelming as his. A large part of him is shocked by the strength before a sudden feeling of undeserving spikes, quickly washed away by happiness again. It's like a drive to do better, to be better, and keep this close between them for as long as possible.
He basks in the soft supernova that is James, trying to be gentle, trying to show the depths of his love and trust, opening his own mind for him if he wants it. Even the parts he would rather hide, he offers James all of himself. ]
[ Jim can understand all too well Finn's desire to keep some kind of control, to establish some limits. Even other times before when they've done this, emotions weren't quite so high, or quite as intense, and right now Jim can tell, even without the connection, that they're both overwhelmed with feelings. No matter how good, that's still a lot to process.
But it doesn't matter. He wants to see it all, and feel it all. Even if it threatens to drown him, he still reaches out and lets Finn's mind wash over his own, wave after wave engulfing him, so much that even his breath shortens, making him gasp and shudder.
Moving when they're like this isn't always easy, but he does it anyway, somehow manages to get his hands on Finn's face, cupping it gently. He leans closer to press their foreheads together, then kisses him on the lips, letting his own feelings for Finn, all the love, excitement, adoration and fear flow free from him and into the other man's mind. ]
[ Finn's breath trembles before the kiss comes, anticipating it without ever opening his eyes. His mind's still so tangled with James' but he still has enough control to return the kiss.
Like many things, he never thought emotions like that could be for him. If anything, it makes him more afraid. He knew that James cared, of course, but to feel all this for him... It's that feelings of responsibility again, reminding him that things like this aren't always easy. That he's not the only one he can hurt.
But Finn's also not alone either. He hadn't even realized how alone he felt before this all started to slowly build.
His hands cup either side of Jim's jaw, fingers splaying into his hair. They're close together, but it's unclear if Finn climbed into his lap or not. All he knows is how close they are, and his mind turns off on that note, just enjoying being together and feeling loved. ]
[ It's not the first time they kiss while they're linked like this, and he hopes it won't be the last. The connection between them lends an added layer of intensity to the kiss, a kind of intimacy that feels all the more engulfing and overwhelming.
It's all the more intense now, when neither of them is holding back, when all feelings are laid out in the open. Whatever the way they've gotten close, Jim doesn't care either; Finn's fingers are on his hair and he hums into the kiss, while his own hands drop to Finn's sides, moving around his waist and fisting his shirt tightly as he brings him even closer. ]
[ Finn hums when he's pulled closer, a sharp spike of pleasure then joy suddenly ringing out between them. They're here. James loves him. This is happening.
Maybe it interrupts how intense and slightly terrifying this moment is, messing up the flow of intimacy. And yet, he can't really hold it back. He smiles into the kiss just as happiness starts to overwhelm him, mixed together with the love. His hands grip at Jim's shirt, deepening the kiss as soon his smile allows, drowning in this. ]
[ Yes, it's happening, but no surprise Finn's brain is only now playing catch-up. To be fair, Jim has had considerably longer to get used to the fact that Finn loves him, so maybe that's why he's not freaking out nearly as much.
He grins vaguely into the kiss when he realizes Finn's smiling, manages to deepen the kiss for a few good seconds, only to break out into a soft kind of laughter a little while later, even as he still keeps a tight grip on Finn's shirt. ] You... did that smiling thing again.
[ When Finn pulls away for a soft laugh, his forehead is still against James. Really, he could be thousands of miles or even lightyears away and should still be able to reach James through the Force like this. But the physical contact doesn't hurt. ]
Sorry. Can't help it.
[ And he really is sorry, even if James has claimed to like it in the past. ]
[ Jim doesn't look or sound at all upset about it, to be fair. Rather the opposite, if anything. Like he's told Finn plenty of times before, he loves the way their kisses dissolve into wide smiles at times, like Finn just can't help how happy he is.
He pets both his cheeks gently, his eyes bright as he pulls away just enough to meet Finn's gaze. ]
Good, [ He says it with a smile, and a happy yet slightly shaky tone. ] I like being able to reciprocate.
[ It's pretty hard for him to believe that he makes anyone happy, especially as happy as James feels through the Force. Finn laughs in response, though, just as shaky. Maybe he can't work with the aforementioned 'forever,' but he's going to try to make James the happiest person in existence for as long as he can.
It almost seems possible, like this, right now.
A palm moves away from his face to rest over Jim's hand. ] Love you... We're going to be useless for a little while, aren't we? [ Because all he wants to do is exactly what they're doing. Sharing each other's thoughts and feelings, staying close, making out a little, crying, and talking about how much they love each other. ]
[ Forever seems kind of overwhelming right now, but then Finn always has been very intense when it comes to them, so he finds himself easily going along with it. There are too many uncertainties, but he finds that he likes thinking of it in terms of 'forever'. Practicality hardly has anything to do with it. ]
Well, I don't know about you, but you know I hate being useless, [ He lets out a soft chuckle, petting Finn's face for a moment, trying to look a little more serious when he adds. ] I mean, we should probably talk about a few things. But it's not important right now, I think it can wait.
[ Finn, for a brief second, can't imagine that there's something more to talk about, something that holds any weight in this. But then he remembers everything else (where they are, where they'll be, whatever home is now) and his happiness threatens to deflate.
But only a little. Nothing could truly ruin this moment, not with the way he feels about it. So his smile merely wavers, and he almost suggests talking now, just getting it over with. Then again, he wonders if maybe this mood won't come back at all when they're done.
He presses their foreheads together again and shuts his eyes. Whether they talk about this or not, Finn knows how things will eventually end up. (And, hell, maybe that's not what Jim wanted to talk about at all.) ] Okay. [ He sighs and drowns in his lover's mind again. It's so easy to slip under now. ]
[ Jim disagrees; there is a lot to talk about, some of which they probably should have talked already, but it's also nothing urgent or life-altering. It can definitely wait a few more days, a couple weeks, or something. He certainly doesn't feel like talking right now.
Instead he would much rather stay right where he is, holding Finn in his arms, embracing him in his mind. With Finn's response, he smiles, then slowly shifts on the couch, sitting with his legs draped over Finn's lap, curling up close to him so they can just enjoy each other's company in a warm, comfortable kind of silence. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
no subject
Jim lets out a soft laugh when Finn kisses his cheek, once and then again, letting out a deep breath with that hug. It feels like an insurmountable weight has been lifted off of him, with something so simple as this. Something so... soft, sweet, uncomplicated.
He feels like an idiot now, he really doesn't know why he was so scared about this. ]
I'll hold you to it, [ He murmurs against Finn's shoulder, then lifts his head up just enough that Finn can hear him more clearly. ] I love you, too.
no subject
Well, one idea.
He tilts his head until his forehead is against James' temple and he reaches out. His own mental state is probably a little overwhelming right now, so he doesn't press or even attempt to invade. All he does is brush his thoughts against James' and tries to relay a little of how he feels. All of his gratefulness and fears and love - so much love - with an unbridled happiness and sense of belonging he's never felt before.
It's there for a beat and begins to wash away just as quickly as it appeared, not wanting to intrude or cause harm, but he lets out his own deep breath in the knowledge that everything's okay. That everything's perfect. ]
no subject
If there's one thing he minds, it's that Finn pulls back almost as quickly as he reaches out, and he instantly closes that distance himself, at least to the best of his ability considering he doesn't have any unique powers nor is he Force sensitive. That he knows, anyway.
But he does open his mind, he thinks as loud as he can that he wants Finn to stay in there, to linger. Don't go, don't go, like he doesn't want Finn to hold back his feelings from him, least of all now. He wants to see and feel them all, just like he wants Finn to sense the feelings he has for him in return, how real and strong they are. ]
no subject
A quiet sob escapes him before he quickly brings them together again, nearly like a mental hug. It's so easy to get lost in it and, for once, Finn doesn't care. He quickly, easily, happily gets lost in James, bringing all of his love with him. His love, protectiveness, fears, pain, thankfulness-
Finn's far more concerned with what James feels. If it's love, he doesn't know, but it's the same thing he feels for James in return. It's strong and warm and safe and just as overwhelming as his. A large part of him is shocked by the strength before a sudden feeling of undeserving spikes, quickly washed away by happiness again. It's like a drive to do better, to be better, and keep this close between them for as long as possible.
He basks in the soft supernova that is James, trying to be gentle, trying to show the depths of his love and trust, opening his own mind for him if he wants it. Even the parts he would rather hide, he offers James all of himself. ]
no subject
But it doesn't matter. He wants to see it all, and feel it all. Even if it threatens to drown him, he still reaches out and lets Finn's mind wash over his own, wave after wave engulfing him, so much that even his breath shortens, making him gasp and shudder.
Moving when they're like this isn't always easy, but he does it anyway, somehow manages to get his hands on Finn's face, cupping it gently. He leans closer to press their foreheads together, then kisses him on the lips, letting his own feelings for Finn, all the love, excitement, adoration and fear flow free from him and into the other man's mind. ]
no subject
Like many things, he never thought emotions like that could be for him. If anything, it makes him more afraid. He knew that James cared, of course, but to feel all this for him... It's that feelings of responsibility again, reminding him that things like this aren't always easy. That he's not the only one he can hurt.
But Finn's also not alone either. He hadn't even realized how alone he felt before this all started to slowly build.
His hands cup either side of Jim's jaw, fingers splaying into his hair. They're close together, but it's unclear if Finn climbed into his lap or not. All he knows is how close they are, and his mind turns off on that note, just enjoying being together and feeling loved. ]
no subject
It's all the more intense now, when neither of them is holding back, when all feelings are laid out in the open. Whatever the way they've gotten close, Jim doesn't care either; Finn's fingers are on his hair and he hums into the kiss, while his own hands drop to Finn's sides, moving around his waist and fisting his shirt tightly as he brings him even closer. ]
no subject
Maybe it interrupts how intense and slightly terrifying this moment is, messing up the flow of intimacy. And yet, he can't really hold it back. He smiles into the kiss just as happiness starts to overwhelm him, mixed together with the love. His hands grip at Jim's shirt, deepening the kiss as soon his smile allows, drowning in this. ]
no subject
He grins vaguely into the kiss when he realizes Finn's smiling, manages to deepen the kiss for a few good seconds, only to break out into a soft kind of laughter a little while later, even as he still keeps a tight grip on Finn's shirt. ] You... did that smiling thing again.
no subject
Sorry. Can't help it.
[ And he really is sorry, even if James has claimed to like it in the past. ]
You just make me so happy.
no subject
He pets both his cheeks gently, his eyes bright as he pulls away just enough to meet Finn's gaze. ]
Good, [ He says it with a smile, and a happy yet slightly shaky tone. ] I like being able to reciprocate.
no subject
It almost seems possible, like this, right now.
A palm moves away from his face to rest over Jim's hand. ] Love you... We're going to be useless for a little while, aren't we? [ Because all he wants to do is exactly what they're doing. Sharing each other's thoughts and feelings, staying close, making out a little, crying, and talking about how much they love each other. ]
no subject
Well, I don't know about you, but you know I hate being useless, [ He lets out a soft chuckle, petting Finn's face for a moment, trying to look a little more serious when he adds. ] I mean, we should probably talk about a few things. But it's not important right now, I think it can wait.
no subject
But only a little. Nothing could truly ruin this moment, not with the way he feels about it. So his smile merely wavers, and he almost suggests talking now, just getting it over with. Then again, he wonders if maybe this mood won't come back at all when they're done.
He presses their foreheads together again and shuts his eyes. Whether they talk about this or not, Finn knows how things will eventually end up. (And, hell, maybe that's not what Jim wanted to talk about at all.) ] Okay. [ He sighs and drowns in his lover's mind again. It's so easy to slip under now. ]
a wrap for now, maybe?
Instead he would much rather stay right where he is, holding Finn in his arms, embracing him in his mind. With Finn's response, he smiles, then slowly shifts on the couch, sitting with his legs draped over Finn's lap, curling up close to him so they can just enjoy each other's company in a warm, comfortable kind of silence. ]